


Loops

by GemmaRose



Category: Dangan Ronpa
Genre: Gen, Temporary Character Death, Time Loop, involuntary time travel, not really sure how to tag this one tbh
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-10-08
Updated: 2015-10-08
Packaged: 2018-04-25 10:42:54
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,335
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4957270
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GemmaRose/pseuds/GemmaRose
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When Togami woke up in a Hope's Peak classroom for the third time, he knew something was wrong.</p><p>Written for <a href="superhighschoollevelsmut.dreamwidth.org/558.html?thread=1119278#cmt1119278">this prompt</a> on SHSLsmut.dreamwidth</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

“I’m sorry.” you choke out as the cold metal collar closes around your neck. You mean it too, but their faces are cold. Your friends, the teens who haved lived alongside you for this past week, don't protest as you're hauled through the tunnel and into the execution chamber. They do follow, of course, but you lose sight of them once the gates slam shut.

It's the cold that kills you, in the end, and you're pretty sure it's a hallucination you reach for in your final moments, because why would Naegi look so regretful? He witnessed the murder, his testimony condemned you. Even if he was closer to you than any of your real brothers ever were, why should he care about your fate now?

\---

You wake up shivering, and frantically rub your arms until the realization kicks in. You woke up. You're not dead. You somehow survived your execution, and have wound up- without your glasses, apparently. They're sitting on the table in front of you, and you put them on with slightly trembling fingers. You're still in the school, back in the room where you first woke up, and your blooming smile is killed by a familiar voice coming from the hallway.

"Hello? If anybody from the Hope's Peak 78th Class is present, I request that you please report to the gymnasium for attendance."

Kiyotaka. But Kiyotaka is dead, brutally beaten and clawed and stabbed to death in his own room only a week ago. Is this hell? No, your friend may have been strict but he did nothing in his short life to deserve eternal damnation. That means this must be some sort of purgatory. You throw open the door, and scoop him into a hug.

The SHSL Hall Monitor stiffens, and you remember that he hates hugs. You pull away, and your returning smile is so wide your cheeks hurt. “Hello, Kiyotaka-kun.”

He stares at you like you’re crazy, and your heart sinks. He doesn’t remember? How can he not remember everything the both of you went through, unless... Was it all a dream? If it was, you probably seem like some sort of overly familiar freak. “Sorry.” you glance at the wall, fully expecting a reprimand.

He laughs, you haven’t heard him laugh since Mondo died, and holds out a hand to shake. “My reputation precedes me. I am Ishimaru Kiyotaka, Super High School Level Prefect. You are?”

“Togami Byakuya, Super High School Level Scion.” your smile returns, even as the familiarity of the situation gnaws at the back of your mind.

“It is an honour to meet a member of such a distinguished family as your own.” Kiyotaka grins, tight and reserved. It’s not the smile you’re used to seeing, but it’s better than his face in the days after Mondo’s murder. Not even Chihiro had been able to help him, though not for lack of trying.

“Why don’t you go check the rooms that way, and I’ll go this way?” you point in opposite directions, and he nods.

“A sound strategy, Togami-kun. We will meet again in the gymnasium at 8:00 sharp.”

“Of course.” you smile, giving a slight nod as he continues in the direction he was already going. You turn to your left, and make a beeline for the room where Makoto said he woke up. If he’s there, then perhaps you had some sort of prophetic dream. If he’s there, then you have to do something, change something, make sure- what? That Maizono doesn’t trick Leon into Makoto’s room? That nobody dies at all?

You shake your head and grip the doorknob. Either Makoto is on the other side of this door and the game of killing starts in under an hour, or the room is empty and Kiyotaka is just living up to his title and making sure nobody tries to skip the orientation.

You open the door, and your eyes fall on him immediately. Makoto is there, in a desk which might’ve been his seat in another life, chest gently rising and falling in his sleep. You hover between laughing and crying for a moment, and settle on crying. Everything is still horrible, your friends will be killing each other in under a week, but for the moment your closest friend is alive and well. You scrub the tears from your eyes as you cross the room, and pull out the chair in the desk in front of his to sit on.

“Makoto-kun.” you reach out and shake his shoulder, making him blink groggily as he lifts his head.

“Wha?” he mumbles, sitting up and rubbing his eyes. “Who’re you?”

His confusion stings, and you blink hard to ward off threatening tears. “Togami Byakuya, Super High School Level Scion. You can call me Byakuya.” you hold out your hand to shake, and he grips it firmly.

“Naegi Makoto, Super High School Level Luckster.” he smiles, open and pure, not yet stained by suspicion and stress and grief. “Nice to meet you, Byakuya-san.”

\---

Junko stamps her foot into Monobear's face, and you remember vividly what happens next. Your body moves of its own accord, and you give the SHSL Fashion Girl a shove hard enough to send her stumbling into the stage. The spears still erupt, only now into your body. You're off centre, and ice creeps down your spine as you realize that you should be in pain, you were just impaled. The world abruptly grows black, and you wake up.


	2. Chapter 2

"I think I'm going crazy." you confide after the twentieth time Sayaka becomes the first killer. Makoto looks concerned, and your chest tightens at the memory of what followed that look in the past.

"What's wrong?"

You nearly cry at the tone of his voice, but that wouldn't help. A few tears escape anyways. "I keep dying, and waking up on the first day."

He doesn't ask what first day, like your tutor would've, but instead offers you to sit on the edge of the mattress next to him. You accept, and bury your face in your hands. "I just want it to stop." your voice comes out small and weak and thick with tears, and you lean into Naegi when he puts an arm around your shoulders.

He says nothing, so you do. You tell him about pushing Kirigiri, how she went down the stairs and you froze for it. You tell him about saving Junko from the spears of Gungnir, about being sliced open by scissors, about drowning and suffocating and bleeding and burning. Your voice is hoarse by the time you reach the most recent one, and fresh tears track down your salted cheeks.

You spare no detail as you describe this death. Hands around your throat, his whole weight pressing down on your windpipe. The creaking springs as you clawed helplessly at his arms, the paralyzing terror which filled you as your vision faded. The look on Makoto's face as he insisted this was for the greater good, you couldn't be trusted, you had betrayed them by keeping secrets.

The arm around your shoulder slides down to settle just below your ribs, and you sob as Naegi's silent support becomes a tight hug.

"It'll be okay." he murmurs, and you want so very badly to believe him.

You do head back to your own room eventually, after Naegi has made you promise not to do anything stupid, and the door shuts behind you with a click which might as well be gunfire for how loud it sounds in the silence. You lock your door out of habit, despite the fact that that nobody comes to kill you on this night, and the solid wood is cool on the back of your head as you lean against it. There’s only one thing you can think of which might end this hellish torture, an idea which has been growing in the back of your head since Sayaka slit your throat.

Your eyes land on the knife, palmed during dinner, and your heart doesn’t even race at the thought of your flesh parting under its smooth sharp blade. It’s already killed you once, and maybe that’s why you find it hard to be afraid of its edge now. The handle fits neatly in your palm, and you turn the shower on full hot before setting your weapon on the edge of the sink. You consider moving the furniture to block the door, but decide against it. The doors are only unlocked after the announcement of a body’s discovery, and there will be no announcement for your corpse.

There will be no announcement for you, because you have locked your door and left the key on your dresser. You will simply disappear, and maybe Naegi will miss you but even that is doubtful. You drop your clothes neatly in the hamper, and grab the knife before stepping into the shower’s spray and sliding the door shut. It burns, and you whimper as searing hot water drums down on your back. The pain is good though, it makes the cold trace of steel down the length of your right arm feel good as you try to memorize the line of your vein. The cut itself hurts, but not as much as you’d feared it would, and you fumble the blade into your shaking dominant hand to repeat the process on your left arm.

The tile is turning brilliant pink, and you think of bringing the knife up to your throat but your arms won’t cooperate. The handle slips from your fingers, and you sit down heavily in the burning hot water which is now definitely pink with blood. Your vision is going dark, and absurdly the last thought through your head before everything goes dark is how disappointed your parents would be if they could see your posture right now.

You open your eyes, and very nearly cry. You’re back in the classroom, your glasses on the teacher’s desk by your crossed ankles. There’s no way out of this hell, except perhaps to win, but your stomach turns at the very thought of murdering one of your classmates. No, you’re not that desperate.

\---

Naegi gives you the same smile as always, tired and apologetic and heart-rending in those aspects. He should be readying himself to watch your execution, not dreading being dragged off to his own. Tears creep from the corners of his eyes, but his voice is steady as he addresses you.

“But it’s okay, you’ll get to live.”

“No!”

Every eye turns to you, and you slam your fist next to the button, tears carving fresh tracks down already wet cheeks. “This isn’t living, that’s what you said!”

“But it’s better than dying.” he laughs bleakly, and Monobear cackles.

You can’t bear to watch as the crusher comes down on Naegi and his desk, or as Monobear pummels Asahina’s chest to a bloody pulp with “CPR”, or as Sakura is overwhelmed and crushed by countless fighting robots, or as Maizono is forced to sing until a giant bear trap snaps shut on her neck. Fukawa is the last to go, crushed by an enormous rolling pin as she tries to reach an impossibly distant cutout of your back, deaf to your pleas for her to come towards you instead, the real you.

“Congratulations.” Monobear chirps once the final execution is over, holding out a button marked Graduation. “Byakuya Togami, for the successful murder of Kyoko Kirigiri, you get to graduate!”

You take the button, and pitch it against the wall as hard as you can. It doesn’t shatter into pieces, like you were hoping, but there is a loud crack as the casing fractures. “I didn’t want this!” you scream, turning on the stuffed robot. The image of Kirigiri at the bottom of the stairs, eyes blank and neck at an impossible angle, flashes through your head and you collapse with the heels of your palms pressed to your eyes. “I didn’t want any of this!”

“Oh?” Monobear tilts its head childishly, managing to look bemused without changing its expression. “But didn’t you push her down the stairs because she said you should stay in this school forever?”

You don’t bother to hold back your sobs, curling in on yourself as Monobear laughs. You did. Kirigiri suggested you accept your fate to stay here, forever, and the thought of spending eternity in this hell drove you to resort to physical force to get your point across. She hadn’t been supposed to die, though. Eventually, long after the chill of the cement has sunk into your bones, you fall asleep.

You wake up not in the familiar classroom, glasses still firmly on your nose, hair stuck to your face and the taste of tears in your mouth. You shouldn’t have let him confess, shouldn’t have let him rush the trial to voting, shouldn’t have let the others so hastily condemn the boy you knew to be innocent. Monobear is slumped against the wall, the light in his eye turned off, and you pick yourself up slowly. Your chest aches, and you have to sit down while the elevator lifts you up to the ground floor. Dead. Everyone is dead. They’re all dead, and it’s your fault. Your fault for pushing her too hard, your fault for screaming when she didn’t get up, your fault for letting Naegi take the blame. Your fault for thinking you could change anything by telling her the truth.

The elevator stops with a rattle, and you numbly make your way to the canteen. You’re not sure why, but you take your seat at the long table and stare at the large steel plates for a long time. It’s terrifying, knowing that you’re the last one left. The only survivor of the fifteen students who entered Hope’s Peak two weeks ago. Super High School Level Survivor. You laugh mirthlessly at that, but no tears come. You wonder if you’ve used them all up crying for your friends.

Something falls from your pocket with a clack, and you blink listlessly at the escape switch. You’ve got no idea what’s waiting out there. Police, like Asahina believed, or the ruined world Hagakure claimed to see in his future predictions? It would be easier to decide whether to stay or go if you knew which answer scared you more.

There is no announcement for Night Time, but your watch marks the time as 22:48 when you finally stand. Your head spins, the world going familiar bright black for a few long seconds before clearing. It only takes a minute to get to the front door, and you press the button before you can think for too long about the consequences. If this is truly the only way to escape the hell you’ve been re-living over and over for the past year, you have to leave.

The door opens surprisingly quickly, given its bulk, and the first thing you see in the pale moonlight (oh God it’s been far too long since you saw real light) is a chain link fence. The lawn as far as you can see is by turns weed choked, overgrown, and dying, and your throat burns as you struggle to breathe the stinking humid air. There are adults loitering just beyond the fence, monobear costume heads obscuring everything above their shoulders, and you hear a startlingly loud CRACK just before searing pain rips through your leg.

You’ve become very familiar with injury in these past months, but this type of pain is new. Gunshot, you think vaguely as you collapse. Your left leg feels broken, and as the chain link fence proves entirely ineffective at stopping the mono-heads from approaching you don’t even try to run. Three of them carry baseball bats, one has a large gun, and the one in front has an honest to god odachi. Is this what the mastermind left for the winner? Guards with orders to kill?

They stand over you, the soulless eyes of the masks boring down, and when you try to push yourself up onto your elbows a bat comes down on your skull. The world goes dark, and with your last moments of consciousness you hope this is the final end.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Asahina’s execution is the only one I made up, the others are all from the official art book.


	3. Chapter 3

The massive doors swing open in front of you for the third time, and even the unflappable Kirigiri coughs at her first breath of foul air. You can’t see any of the monoheads who killed you the first time, nor the monobots that mowed everybody down the second time. You’ve finally made it. It makes a twisted sort of sense that Junko was the one behind your endless looping, and now that she’s dead it’s finally over.

You’re aware that the smile spreading across your face is nothing like Asahina’s or Naegi’s or even Fukawa’s, but you can’t stop yourself. Just like you can’t stop the broken laugh that bubbles up in your throat as you walk out onto the weed choked lawn with your friends. Hagakure is the first to notice, or at least the first to indicate his awareness of the fact that the mask you’ve so carefully held together these five horrible years is finally cracking. You fall, catching yourself on hands and knees, and you’re not sure if it was your knees going weak or your foot catching on a knot of weeds that caused it. You’re not so sure of anything anymore.

Asahina is the one who kneels next to you and feels for a fever, but it’s the look on Naegi’s face which sends you over the edge into full on hysterical laughter. The last time you can remember him looking so concerned for you, you woke up in that damned classroom gasping for air.

“Togami-san, are you okay?” he kneels next to Asahina while Fukawa starts fretting.

The laughter won’t stop, but every second it drags on the sound becomes more demented, more unnatural. “I- I-” you gasp for air, press a hand to your chest as if that could actually help anything. “I can’t-”

“Give him some space.” Kirigiri’s voice cuts through the background noise of Fukawa’s worrying, and Asahina’s hands lift from your shoulders as she shifts her weight to her heels. “We need to be ready to leave by nightfall.”

You move a hand to your mouth to muffle the laughter, and Kirigiri assigns everyone but herself a task collecting food, water, blankets, medicine, and bags to carry everything in. Naegi seems almost reluctant to go, but Hagakure pulls him away with words pitched too low for you to make out. In no time at all you’re alone with Kirigiri, and she kneels patiently in front of you until the laughter has ebbed enough for you to swallow it and speak.

“Sorry.” the apology slips out before you remember that you should be piecing your mask back together, and the slight widening of her eyes makes you flinch internally. None of them know you anymore. They know the Super High School Level Scion, not Togami Byakuya, and it’s been that way for the past four years.

“Did you not believe Genocider?” Kirigiri asks, standing as you get to your feet.

The way out is clear, simply tell yet another lie and you’ll be able to put the mask back on, just in case this turns out not to be the end of the loops. You could lie now, and keep lying until you die, or you could tell them the truth and hope they take it well this time. “No,” you shake your head, dusting bits of grass from your pants legs. “Sorry for worrying everyone.” you look up, and smile properly for the first time in years. There are countless apologies on your lips, for killing her and lying to everyone and not saving them sooner with your knowledge of so many possible futures, but you swallow those as she tentatively returns your smile. There will be plenty of time for apologies later.


End file.
